Ask yourself: Why am I uncomfortable with the photos?If you are feeling threatened or insecure, you may need to redefine how you understand grief and the relationship deceased loved ones play in the lives of those who mourn them.Think about it – people aren’t erased from their families or their family history simply because they have died.Would you think it odd for someone to have a photo of a deceased grandparent, sibling, or child in the home?I am dating a widow(er) and they are still close to their deceased partner’s family. First, let’s be clear, it’s very hard to say what is and isn’t normal in grief.Let’s just say, though, it certainly isn’t abnormal!Sometimes this is simply because a person values the love and support of the family members, and sometimes because they are people you can share memories and stories with.
They often start to view their ongoing grief through this new lens and this may mean revisiting your role in the family.Most likely not and 9/10 the same rule applies here.People do not cease to care about loved ones simply because they have died so, no, we would not recommend you ask them to take the photos down. Their relationship and love for that person will continue and that is normal and healthy (if this is blowing your mind, check out this post on Continuing Bonds Theory).Ask yourself: Why are you uncomfortable with the relationship? If you are uncomfortable with the relationship, it is reasonable to express your feelings (you have a right to your feelings, after all). I am dating a widow(er) who has children and I am really nervous about meeting them. Make sure you are both on the same page about what the kids have been told and how you are being introduced.Do you feel concerned their late partner’s family won’t accept you? What you decide may depend on the age of the children, whether you are the first person the widow(er) has dated (or at least who the kids have met), etc.
Always remember that the parent/partner who died is still a member of the family.