Some women feel like they need to keep their partners sexually satisfied or risk losing them, so they push themselves out of their comfort zones.
Other people will start feeling pressure if a certain amount of time has gone by without having sex.
I care about her so much, and I want to do whatever I can. Your girlfriend is lucky to have a partner who is so sensitive and supportive.
Here are six ways to be a good partner to a person who has been sexually abused.
An Important Note: I'll be using female pronouns here in order to respond directly to your question, but my answers would apply to a male partner who's been sexually abused as well.
Every person’s experience with sexual abuse is different, and no two recovery processes look the same.
You sound like a sensitive person who wouldn’t want to put pressure on your girlfriend to do anything she doesn’t want to do.
That being said, the topic of pressure can feel exceedingly delicate for many sexual abuse survivors.
There are also lots of great exercises you can do together to help your girlfriend feel more comfortable and safe.
We’re always hearing that we could be having better sex, a better orgasm, or a better relationship.
But how often do we hear the nitty-gritty of how we can actually better understand our deepest desires and most embarrassing questions?
Tell her you’re open to hearing any parts of her story that she feels comfortable telling you. You don’t want to put her on the spot or pepper her with questions, but let her know you care and want to be there for her in any way that feels good for her.
When your girlfriend was abused, she was forced into doing something without her consent.
One client I worked with felt pressured when her male partner initiated sex nonverbally because she didn’t know exactly what he wanted, and would start getting anxious.